nautika3 (nautika3) wrote in lotr_community,

Learning the Hard Way by nautika

Author: nautika
Title: Learning the Hard Way
Rating: G
Theme: 010 january potluck challenge
Elements: a parent, a kitchen, a bucket, and the word fragrant done in Dialogue
Author's Notes: Some beta I am! I wrote the story based on the word *fragrance* and then had to redo it at the last minute! Oh, and I am not Tolkien.
Summary: Faramir smells a rat…or something. What is Gimli’s explanation?
Word Count: 453

“What is that … fragrant aroma?”
“You needn’t be shy, laddie. Call it what it is. It’s a stink or a horrible rank smell, but it is *not* a fragrant aroma.”
“Very well, then. What is that terrible, foul, pungent odor and how did it come to be emerging from my…from Eowyn’s kitchen? Do not tell me it is Eowyn’s cooking for she has put her food poisoning days behind her – with the help of Cook and Arwen, of course.”
“Laddie, you wound me! I would never blame your wife for my … lack of judgment.”
“What lack of judgment is that, Gimli?”
“Well, perhaps that’s not the best way of putting it.”
“Are you trying to avoid the question, Gimli?”
“No, laddie, I’m not trying to avoid the question. I’m trying to avoid the answer.”
“Gimli, my friend, I believe you know it will be better to tell me rather than Eowyn. No, wait. I have changed my mind. I am going to stay out of this and *you* can tell Eowyn.”
“Now, laddie. Come back here. Let’s not be hasty. It’s just … well … Iledaberncudalackofmair.”
“Slow down or speak up, Gimli! You led a bear to one of our mares?”
“There’s no need to raise your eyebrows at me, Faramir. I feel foolish enough.”
“I beg your pardon, Gimli. But what does your hair – which you should not have parted with, by the way – have to do with that stench? And where *is* Elboron?”
“I sent him to help collect eggs – to be sure he was safely out of hearing range when we spoke. The lad said it was a homework project, and as an honorary uncle, I wanted to help him with his education. Of course, as you can see…smell…I am the one who learned the lesson.”
“I sincerely hope so. What did he put on it to make hair smell like that?”
“It isn’t what he put on it. It’s what he did to it. He wrapped it in parchment, put it in a pail and burned it. Don’t worry. I was with him the whole time. There was no risk of his setting the house alight or burning himself. I imagine the stink of the hair would have been bad enough, but he must have used the bucket that Eowyn carries manure in to fertilize her garden, and well, I guess that’s everything. Faramir? Faramir! Well, I suppose I have it coming but, when you are through having a good laugh, I need to ask you something.”
“Of course, Gimli, forgive me. What do you need?”
“We can keep this between us, can’t we? I mean – there’s no need to tell the elf!”
Tags: 2010, annual challenge: potluck, challenge: 2010 potluck, january, month: 2010 january
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